Don't Cry
by Collie Parkillo
Summary: If you knew Masaomi Kida, you'd know that he doesn't cry. But sometimes that changes, and Mikado has to be there. MiKida, T for swearing.


**disclaimer: Durarara! does not belong to me**

* * *

If you know Masaomi Kida, you'd know that he doesn't cry.

He's always smiling, always ready to crack some dumb joke, you just can't picture him even shedding a single tear for anything. The worst he gets is making self-deprecating jokes or being slightly disappointed at being blown off by a girl.

But that's when you can see him. Because some days, Masaomi Kida just can't anymore. He walks home, says a quick farewell to his friends, and just goes up to his room and cries. Sometimes it lasts for hours on end, hours of just lying there sobbing. It's therapeutic, and although sometimes he's left shaking and gasping from it, he feels less empty afterwards.

The feeling of his tears dampening the pillow against his face isn't one he relishes. _Damn, how pathetic are you, crying into your pillow like you're five? I hope you know what a wuss you look like._

Masaomi takes a deep breath and pulls himself up, sniffling a bit. His vision is still blurred and his eyes sting, he just wants to close them and never open them again. It subsides, after a few minutes, but the lingering feeling in the corner of his eyes always remains.

"Masaomi?"

He looks around the room in a panic, frantically wondering if it's his mother. Shit, shit, shit, shit, come up with an explanation, you were...you got a bad grade...come on...

But he turns around and it's not his mother standing in the doorway. It's Mikado Ryuugamine, with his school bag still slung over his shoulders and his hair rumpled from the wind outside. And he looks absolutely stunned.

"H-how long have you been here for?" Masaomi doesn't have the strength to sound angry, but he hopes for once that his words are enough to drive Mikado away.

"About ten minutes." Mikado is his best friend, his reluctant, shy partner in crime, and suddenly a wave of panic comes rushing onto him as he wonders if this will ruin their friendship. Mikado then moves out of the doorway and into his room, setting his bag down on the floor and coming to sit beside Masaomi.

"Sorry," is all the blonde boy can think to say.

"Why are you sorry?" Mikado puts a hand on his shoulder and he feels like he should jerk away, but he doesn't.

Masaomi cracks a smile, still trying to look away from Mikado. "Why shouldn't I be sorry? You've been watching me cry for the past ten minutes."

"What's so bad about crying?"

Masaomi stares away from Mikado, his eyes almost glazing over. Somehow his mouth won't move to form a response, and he almost wants to start crying again. It was all fine when he was alone, but now that someone's _listening _life seems so much more tragic.

Mikado cups one of Masaomi's cheeks in his hand and turns his head towards him. "Masaomi? It's alright to...you know, cry." Masaomi knows that Mikado isn't the best with words, but his voice is enough. Something in the other boy's voice is calming, he isn't sure what it is, but it's helping a lot.

"Seriously...Everybody does it. Who's to say that you can't?" The words still seem to come out jumbled and Mikado is blushing slightly, and instead of trying to express himself unsuccessfully with words, he wraps his arms around Masaomi in a hug.

This surprises the other boy, and he can hear him mumbling that it's okay and it will be alright over and over again like some sort of spell.

And Masaomi can't help it, he starts crying again. It's not out of sadness, but something deep within him is telling him that he doesn't deserve this. He's come to feel stale and empty when he's not crying. Mikado starts rubbing circles on his back with his hand and whispering _shh._

It's strange, because Masaomi was always the one who expected to have to be here for Mikado, and yet Masaomi is whimpering and crying in Mikado's arms.

He doesn't know how long they just sit like that, but eventually Masaomi can't cry anymore and he just whines and gasps for a few minutes. Mikado disentangles himself from his friend and instead puts his hands on his shoulders.

"Are you feeling better?"

Masaomi nods and Mikado leans forward and kisses Masaomi's forehead. It doesn't last long and Masaomi has to remind himself that he has a girlfriend, Mikado is another boy. But for the moment he doesn't even care, and some part of him just wants Mikado to do that _again._

The two boys stare at each other for a few seconds, and Mikado's face has so much concern on it that it's almost comical and suddenly Masaomi starts laughing. It's not as loud as he usually does, but it's not forced. Mikado looks somewhat puzzled and then asks, "Why are you laughing?"

"Your face," Masaomi says, giggling again. Mikado smiles, happy to see his friend gaining back a bit of his normal attitude. He jokingly hits his friend, and soon they're wrestling playfully on the bed.

Eventually the pair end up with Masaomi practically laying on top of Mikado, his head tucked underneath his best friend's chin. He wonders if it's stupid that he just wants to stay here forever and not have to go to school and contribute to the world and society. In that world, he has a girlfriend to keep up with and grades to worry about, and he'd much rather just lay here with Mikado for the rest of his life, not having to deal with inconveniences like that.

"I'm sorry that you were sad. I wish I could have helped earlier, I guess." It's such a simple, awkward, Mikado-esque thing to say, and somehow it's the most comforting thing Masaomi's ever heard.

"You helped now."

Mikado tilts his head downwards and plants a kiss on Masaomi's cheek, tasting the salty remnants of tears on his face. He doesn't feel like crying anymore, but if he were to, he'd be comfortable enough to. Because now he knows that Mikado would just try to kiss his tears away and comfort him in his clumsy, Mikado way.

And that's what matters, after all, that no matter how hard Masaomi cries, he's sure that Mikado will be there.

* * *

**oh god, I love this ship to pieces, I just really wanted to contribute to it. **


End file.
